I Love You Even Though You're Far Away
by Yukitarina
Summary: He needed to see her, more than anything...


A/N: Thank you very much for the reviewers :'D

Disclaimer: I love Abel and Esther but I don't own them.

-o-

**I Love You Even Though You're Far Away**

-o-

He thought it was a nightmare.

But it was not.

Abel ran wildly-he didn't care about anything, a winding road or danger or the fact that his destination is too far. He needed to move quickly, he must do it quickly.

He needed to see her, more than anything...

An hour ago he heard that the Queen of Albion was shot on her head. She was in a dangerous condition right now, almost no heartbeat. The royal healer had given up their attempt to save her. She was dying.

Abel didn't remember how long he had been running, but finally he managed to reach the castle, passing the guards and everybody who blocked his way.

"Hey!" The guards shouted. "Stop there! You must clarify your identity! Hey!''

He didn't stop, passing the corridors full of ornaments and golden adornment. The light from the chandelier almost blinded him, but he didn't care.

"Stop! We'll shoot you if you don't!"

Because he didn't do anything except running, the guards raised their weapons and directed them to him.

"Stop!" They began to shoot when seeing he aimed to the Queen's room. Being skillful in war he was, he managed to duck and get away from the bullets. The guards next to the Queen's door were ready to shoot as well, but Abel defeated them and without any doubted, snapped open the door.

He was startled.

The vast room was full of white roses and lilies, as if the owner has been ready to be sent to the grave. Tens of maids cried hardly with mourns, something which only happened in a funeral home.

"Tovarisch...," a woman with red fringe stepped at him. She performed her usual toughness and control, but Abel could see that she was devastated.

"Miss Asta," he whispered.

She shook in grief, looking at the luxurious four posters bed in the middle of the room. Without even asking Asta what she was doing here, Abel ran to the bed and snapped open the silken curtains.

A figure he really knew slept serenely on the bed. Her eyes were closed, and her red hair framed her visage in an elegant and beautiful shape. All she wore was white in colour; her white royal gown, her diamond-coated necklace, her satin shoes. But her red hair and tinted lips gave dramatic contrast in her ambience, also the red roses peered in the middle of the white ones.

"Miss Esther," he held her shoulders and shook her gently. More than anything, he wanted her to open her eyes and see him with the mixture of wonder and happiness as usual. He would sacrifice anything for it...

"Wake up, Esther," he shook her shoulders again. His throat began to ache, as if being torn apart. "Esther, this is me, Abel Nightroad. Father. Can't you remember?" He lifted her hands and attached them to his long silver hair and his glasses.

But still she didn't move.

"Esther," he whispered. "Wake up! I beg you," he shook her harder. "Wake up! Esther! Miss Esther!"

"Abel," Asta marched on him.

"Wake up! Esther! Esther!"

"Stop it, Abel, you hurt her!"

Hearing it, Abel was struck and went still for a very long time.

His knees dropped on the floor, his fringe covered his tired face. He never felt this frail in all of his life... he couldn't feel anything but the lost of his breath and his anguish.

Minutes later he laid his cheek on her belly, looking for any sign of warmth which signified that she was still alive.

"Forgive me..," he whispered. "Forgive me I'm unable to protect you this time..."

He shifted his head until touching her embrace, until he heard a very soft heartbeat.

"She's still alive," he said emptily.

"Yes, Abel," said Asta quietly. "She's still alive. You can't say she's dead, but she's in the highest stadium of coma. Some numbers of extremist shot right to her head. There's no hope."

The sun was rising and setting, the whole world has lived on its life.

But Abel Nightroad kept resting his head on Esther Blanchett's embrace, never ran away from her. His eyes gazed at nowhere with thick emptiness, a long and dark tunnel with no end.

-o-

It had been a week. Neither Asta nor the maids could set him away from Esther, even though his face wasn't directed to hers again. Instead he was now staring at the window, showered by the light, with his cheek still in her embrace.

"Father," one of the maids begged carefully. "I'm sorry...but would you please leave her for a while? We have to bath her."

He didn't react even a bit.

Five minutes later the maid spoke again.

"Father..."

"Just do it," he said with the same emptiness. "I'll stay here. Don't worry," he closed his eyes, implying that he wouldn't dare to interrupt the process.

The maid hesitated, but finally she decided to do her duty. When she finished she gently asked Abel to open his eyes. He obeyed, and stunned on how the familiar fragrance of perfume and soap invited his tears.

"I know," he whispered when sensing Asta beside him.

"What?" She asked.

"I know how to save her."

"How?"

He rose, gazing at Esther's pale visage, murmuring, "Nanomachine."

"What?!" Asta shouted. "No..."

"It might work on her," he was about to touch her, but Asta immediately slapped his face so hard it sent him hitting the floor.

"Just wake up, Abel!" She screamed and pulled her gun from her jacket, pointing it to his head. "You don't want to do it! You're depressed! Try to do anything foolish and I'll shoot you! I'll shoot you, I swear!" Her voice cracked. "I don't care even if you are my Tovarisch!"

Abel stared, still lying on the floor.

He couldn't think, he couldn't hear, he couldn't speak...his mind was hollow except with the sound of her grief, calling him over and over again. He remembered on how she screamed hysterically after Cain defeated him. He remembered on how he wanted to wake up, but he couldn't...

_"No...! Nooo, Father! No, I want to be with you! Father...! Father...!"_

"Esther...," he whispered.

And he started to cry...

-o-

He put his head on her arms again. He felt better after shedding some tears that he could gain a bit awareness towards his surroundings.

"Why are you here, Miss Asta?" He asked, the same monotonous voice, but better than nothing.

"The Empress asked me to stay beside the Queen," she murmured.

He blinked slightly. "That's the way Seth is, isn't it?"

"What about your mission?" She asked then.

"She's more important," he gently reached Esther's hand, and grief soon haunted his countenance again. "I can't forgive myself. I'll never forgive myself."

Asta stared at him to examine his feature.

"That's the way you are, isn't it?" she said sadly. "Always blaming yourself."

He inhaled a deep breath, closing his eyes.

As he heard Asta stepping away, he said, "Thank you, Tovarisch…." Though he couldn't see it, he knew Asta heard him and replied it with her nods.

There were only Abel and Esther right now. He straightened up, looking at her and softly stroking her hair. She was still sleeping, soundly as fairytale.

"Don't worry," he whispered, smiled warmly for the first time since he entered the room. "I'll stand by your side…."

As the wind blew from the French windows, he took a deep breath once more, turning his sight outside.

He didn't know her lips twisted into a warm smile as well.

-o-

It was a miracle, they said.

Three months had passed, and in that length of time, Abel never left her side, taking care of her and often sharing some interesting bedtime stories, for he was sure she could hear him.

Apparently the attempt was fruitful. The royal healers mentioned that Lady Esther's health showed very significant progress. It was possible for her to open her eyes anytime right now.

A miracle, they said, sent in the form of a beloved one.

"You're not a pumpkin-headed, after all," smiled Asta. "Your presence is so useful."

Abel smiled back at her. As she left the Queen's room, he turned to Esther again. Her face was more colorful, her cheeks pink as carnation.

"May I sleep for a while?" he asked. "I haven't slept since…. Well, wake me up when it is 13 p.m., would you?" And as always, he rested his head on her embrace.

When he asked her to wake him up at 13 p.m., he didn't mean it seriously.

But it happened, after all. He heard a very memorable voice calling out his name.

"Father Nightroad…."

It must be a dream, and he didn't want to lose the joyfulness within. So he kept slumbering.

"Father Nightroad, wake up…. You said you want me to wake you up at 13 p.m. Don't be too lazy. Wake up."

He gave up. Slowly, he opened his eyes.

What he saw first were two bright blue orbs, gazing at him kindly.

He woke up, straightened his back.

Esther was smiling at him.

A perfect silence followed. The blue eyes were looking at each other in the moment that felt like forever.

Then Esther began to shed tears so many she couldn't count them.

"I'm so useless, aren't I, Father?" she whispered. "Even after all this time, I can't stop depending on you…," she took his hands and held them tight. "I always be a burden for you. Forgive me…."

He shook his head.

"I'm glad you're safe," he said. "I'm sorry I can't do anything this time."

"It's not your fault…."

She sobbed earnestly when Abel reached her into his arms.

The same as her, the tears he dropped were so many that he couldn't count them.

But he didn't mind, because at last, what he shed were relief tears, for knowing that she was alive, that he still had a chance to tell her how much he needed her….

"I…," she said. "I don't want you to leave again…"

He didn't reply. But all in all, she knew exactly what was in his mind.

Until Cain was defeated, he would never stop fighting….

-o-

That night, Abel chanted a bedtime story again. He chose a certain story because he knew she would love it. And she did, for it was about a klutz who was crazy for thirteen-spoon sugar, travelling outside the Earth to defeat the enemy of the world.

"He leaves his loved one," he said. "But he promised her that he would still love her, even though she is far away."

Esther closed her eyes miserably when his lips touched her forehead. "Goodnight, Esther."

"If only I knew you would leave me again, I'd better stay coma for years."

"Stop it," he turned stern. "You don't want it."

"I do," suddenly she woke up and set her blanket aside. Her eyes flared. "Don't act as if you understand my wish."

"You'd better slee—"

"No! Stop forcing me! Doesn't a Krusnik understand a human's feeling? You'll love me though I'm far away, but time doesn't matter for you, because you're immortal! And what about me?! I was shot right on my head, I was dying, Father! I was about to die! Human has a very short lifespan, and what'll happen to me when you finally defeat Mr. Cain?! How long will you run after him?! One hundred years?! One thousand years?! Tell me, Father Nightroad! How long…? How long do I have to wait…?" she began to weep.

He spoke after a while.

"You don't have to wait," he said.

Esther wept for some time before she finally gained her control. She brushed away her tears at once, looked away, and said with low voice. "Get out."

Abel sat still.

She seemed too far right now… even though her shadow was reflected perfectly on his glasses.

"I said get out," she said again. "I'm better off without you."

He responded it with the same quietness, before nodding slightly, then stood up slowly.

"Forgive me," he whispered.

She didn't reply, keeping herself still as a statue, until she heard the sound of the closing door.

Outside, Abel walked to the castle's yard absentmindedly.

When he reached the center of the sweet-smelling garden, his knees fell on the grass. He bowed his head, sending his hair covered his face like a waterfall, letting his heart shattered like a broken glass…

Meanwhile Esther still stared at nowhere, her lips trembled, her tears fell heavily. But just like before, she brushed it away, though it never stopped circling down her cheeks.

The door was opened some minutes later. Asta's voice echoed in the darkness. "Where's Abel?" she asked.

"Gone," Esther tried to sound tough, but failed.

A long silence preceded.

"He always stayed by your side," said Asta then, very quietly but clear. "When you were coma, he never left you even for a second."

"Is it useful to stay beside me while I can't see him at all?"

There was a pause before Asta smiled encouragingly.

"Some people are like that." She added before closing the door. "Love is the strangest thing of all. It is even weirder when it comes to a weirdo like Abel. He has his own way of loving, and as someone who gets an honour to accept it, I think it's necessary for you to understand it."

Asta left. Esther sat silently in the still of the night.

Because she was sick of sleeping, she chose to stay awake until dawn.

Abel's shadow never left her mind….

And all of a sudden, his voice unexpectedly reached her hearings again.

At first she thought it was only her imagination, but then she knew it was real. Abel was standing beyond her room's entrance.

"Miss Esther," he said softly.

She didn't bother to take a long gaze on the door.

"I'm sorry I haven't left yet."

Abel attached his hand on the door, with the usual hint of emptiness.

"I…," he went on quietly, "I only want you to know…I'll do my best to defeat him. For your sake…I promise it won't take a hundred or a thousand years. I'll keep thinking of you from the distance, though you've said you're better off without me."

A long silence emerged before he continued.

"But without you I…," he trailed off.

He felt that he couldn't speak anymore, so he slid down, leaning on the door as if it was his only place to live on, and closed his eyes.

"No matter what," he whispered, "I'll stand by your side…."

After saying his last goodnight, he stood up and walked away. This time for real.

Inside her room, Esther covered her face with her hands to muffle her sobs….

-o-

A year later, again she was shot by a number of extremists. Not in the head, but it was enough to cause her unconscious for a week.

Again, Abel marched on the castle, avoiding the bullets while running to the Queen's door.

Again, he rested his head on her embrace.

When she woke up, she found his kind blue eyes gazing at her, his lips smiled widely.

"You're awake," he beamed.

"Father," she wept.

Then she woke up and hugged him tight, her tears fell on his robe.

He replied her and running his hands through her hair.

"I've told you," he whispered. "I'll stand by your side…."

"Thank you," she whispered back.

"For…?"

She tightened her embrace to feel his warmth.

"For loving me even though I'm far away…"

**-end-**


End file.
